My mom loves to get “fapitzed.”
Getting fapitzed is one of my mom’s favorite things to do. Fapitzed is Yiddish for getting “all dolled up.” Your fancy dress and big girl shoes, make-up and sparkly earrings!
I loved it when Amber Ruffin (host of The Amber Ruffin Show and former head writer/star on Late Night with Seth Meyers) showed up on camera, from her home, in a formal gown. For her, and for my mom, too, the simple act of dressing up made them feel special and made the moment extraordinary. It may sound superficial, but when you look good, you feel good.
Changing Your Attitude from the Outside In
It’s no secret that anxiety has increased since the beginning of the pandemic. Less social contact, uncertainty about the future and fear can all contribute. And, yet we still, hopefully, are still producing and moving forward.
For me that’s meeting deadlines and creating wins for clients, staying positive for my family through their own challenges with school and work and bringing 200% energy to motivating people taking my fitness classes.
Sometimes it’s exhausting. Sometimes it triggers anxiety. Always, through it all, there are still things that need to get done. Not to minimize those very real feelings (and don’t delay seeking medical or mental health support when you need it!), sometimes I know it’s the narrative running in my head that’s the issue.
If I stop and ask what is happening right now, in this moment, right before me, I realize it may be what I’m telling myself that’s the problem. That’s when I know I need to change my attitude from the outside in.
Here are tricks that work for me:
When I’m Itching to Pick a Fight
|On days when I can feel that I’m a little feisty, a simple love shirt literally places love next to my heart. I feel it softening already.
Everything’s Coming up Roses
|With so much stress about so many awful things in the world right now, sometimes I have to pause to look at it all through rose colored lenses. Actual sunglasses with rose colored lenses. I keep them on my desk.
These glasses work well when combined with singing out loud–think Helen Reddy “I Am Woman“).
When Your Inner Voice is Not Helping
|When my inner voice is particularly annoying and trying so hard to derail me, I invite her to be a part of the solution.
Rather than whispering mean things in my ear, with this shirt she can be front and center and a part of the team.
|Crazy? Maybe. But nobody got hurt and all of these tricks make me smile. Studies show that 1.) smiling can boost your own mood and 2.) smiles are contagious. This self-generated smile already affords you an advantage to interact with family, clients, colleagues…and even your mother.
What will you do to jumpstart a new attitude or get out of a rut in the moment? I shared mine, to hopefully give you ideas.